Funks

It's funny. It doesn't seem to take much to get me in a funk sometimes. Last weekend, for some odd reason, I tromped up to the water storage tank. It's in the upper orchard area and can't be seen from the house or driveway. I think I went to pick a few lemons and while I was up there, I decided to check the tank. Sure enough, I found about four very small but very definite leaks. Everything is original around here which means that the tank is of the 1985 vintage. So there I was, last Sunday afternoon, in the cold, trying to patch the tank with J-B Weld. I knew it needed to be dry in order to stick but I tried anyway and you know what I was thinking? "This is a man's job!" But of course, the man is MIA so it's me. Now, I'm a pretty handy woman and there is no reason why I can't take care of some of this stuff. It was just the principle of the thing, you know? And for a short time, I gave in to the temptation of anger and blame.

When it became apparent that the J-B Weld was not going to stick on the wet tank (duh) I decided to turn the well pump off, use up most of the water until the water level dipped below the leaks, patch, let dry, turn pump back on, and voila! Water again, hopefully within a day or so. Good plan, I thought. I really had no idea how long it would take for us to use up that much water but the tank looks giant to me so I turned the pump off Sunday night. I was hoping that we'd have water for the next four days or so and that I could do my repairs on the weekend when I didn't have to worry about getting a shower before work. Again, good plan, I thought. However, when did we run out of water? Tonight! During Bible Study. After only two days. I came home in a funk.

I grabbed a flashlight, put on my boots and once again tromped up into the orchard. Finally, it occurred to me that I was on dangerous ground, attitude wise, and that I'd better take a minute to pray. I asked the Lord to help me not blame the leaks on a guy who hasn't even been around for two + years. After all, things wear out. I can't blame everything on him. I realized how selfish and spoiled I am. At this point, I hadn't had water for a whole two hours but I'd gone into survival mode like it was going to last forever. I checked out the tank again, decided that I couldn't attempt to patch it by flashlight late at night, gave up and turned the well pump back on. We'll have water by morning and I'll shut it off in a day or two and try again.

All the while, I knew this was a small problem; a minor setback. Why did it put me into such a funk? I'm still pondering that but I think that I do pretty well in the larger dramas of life but it's the little things that trip me up.  Satan is well aware of that as well. I don't guard myself adequately. I'm either relying on my own abilities to take care of all the little details of life and forget to bring God into the equation, or perhaps I get worn down by some of the bigger difficulties that I've experienced and even though I've gotten through them with the Lord's help, I fail to realize how depleted my strength is and so I am easy prey for an invitation to a pity party. Shame on me. I should know better.

All this random blathering on about the well...and what is my conclusion? I think I need to praise God for these smallish problems because they draw my attention to weaknesses in myself and shift my focus just a little more towards my Creator. And every time God allows me to gain a small victory over my sinful, selfish tendencies, He prepares me a little more for those larger dramas of life that are sure to come. Thank you, Lord. I will be in the orchard again this weekend, again without water, again attempting a patch job. I'm hoping and praying that my attitude will be totally different this time and I'm grateful that God is giving me a second chance.